I deserve worse

"G u r u m u k h a p a d m a v a k y a"

I deserve worse ………...… Nectarean Mellows

If you really think that you are not an exalted personality, you will think that I deserved it. Ambrisha Maharaj was a great devotee. Durvasa Muni created a monster to kill him, Ambrisha said, "Krsna if You think I deserve to die then the best thing is he kills me, no problem". Krsna thought this was terribly offensive and He sent the Sudarsan Chakra and to chase after Durvasa Muni for one full year and after that full year; Ambrisha Maharaj did not eat for a year because until Durvasa Muni took his prasad he couldn't eat because he still considered him as a guest. So when Durvasa Muni came and fell at the feet of Ambrisha Maharaj, Ambrisha Maharaj said I forgive you for your offence, he said I am such a sinful rascal that I deserved whatever you did; so you didn't offend me at all; this whole reaction is some lila between you and Krsna, it is nothing to do with me; I deserved it….. It is only when you think in a position you don't deserve to suffer; that you take offence by other devotee. But if you think that I need so much purification and I deserve so much suffering for my purification; that if anybody treats me terribly, its just Krsna's mercy coming through that person; that person should be awarded for giving me so much of a chance to purify my ego; that's the way we should think but Krsna may not think like that; that's His business. But if you are expecting something high; then you are offended when you get something low but if you are expecting something low then how can anyone offend you?
H H Radhanath Swami Maharaj